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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24628279">before you go</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/thoughtsofher/pseuds/thoughtsofher'>thoughtsofher</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>FFC-Acrush (Band), Fanxyred</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/F, fluff with a bit of angst, kejun rights</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 00:27:19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,475</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24628279</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/thoughtsofher/pseuds/thoughtsofher</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Keran is leaving for an idol survival show. Junxi is in her feelings.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>An Junxi/Lu Keran</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>29</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>before you go</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>my writing is very very rusty so please be nice to me &lt;3 enjoy lol</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Turning around in bed for what feels like the hundredth time that night, Junxi pressed the home-button on her phone and watched as the screen lights up. The bright light blinding her. She groans, quickly checking the time.</p><p>2:43 am.</p><p><em>Sigh</em>.</p><p>The days had passed by so quickly recently. But the moment her head hit the pillow at night, time seemed to stop completely. She closes her eyes. And suddenly her mind is running wild. Her heartbeat starts picking up. And she can’t sleep.</p><p>She had tried to ignore the obvious reasoning behind all of this for days. First living in denial, before slowly starting to accept her fate and not being able to do anything about it. Her emotions were getting to her at the worst time possible.</p><p>She sighs, rubbing the tiredness from her eyes. She really can’t believe she’s losing several hours of sleep every night because of a girl. And not just any girl.</p><p>"Junxi?" Keran’s tired voice could be heard from above.</p><p><em>Shit</em>.</p><p>"Go back to sleep Keke, it’s late."</p><p>The room fell silent again. She felt relieved when it seemed like the other girl had fallen back asleep. Maybe she’d let it pass one more time. But then there was shuffling from the top bunk. Junxi froze. The last thing she wanted right now was to have a heart-to-heart conversation with Keran.</p><p>There was a light thud as feet hit the floor. And before she knew it, a slender figure was standing next to her bed. Nudging her knee to try and make her move. With a quiet sigh Junxi reluctantly moved her body closer to the wall, making room for the other girl to lay down next to her.</p><p>Keran wasted no time crawling into bed, making herself comfortable underneath the covers.</p><p>"How am I supposed to sleep when you’ve been tossing and turning all night?" The taller girl pouted.</p><p>As the silence stretched out, the playful pout on Keran’s face slowly faded into a more worried expression. An arm wrapped itself around Junxi’s waist, pulling her just a little closer. Junxi only sparing her a glance as she felt a hand slip under her shirt, starting to trace soothing shapes onto her back with her fingertips.<br/>She hopes the room is dark enough that Keran won’t notice her cheeks turning red.</p><p>Being this close with Keran wasn’t something new. Spending years under the same roof had only brought them closer together. But she worries that somewhere along the way they might have gotten too close. Too comfortable with each other. And she hates that it has to be bad thing. Could this be why she suddenly felt so nervous around the other girl?</p><p>"What’s going on Junjun? why aren’t you sleeping?"</p><p>Junxi didn’t really like to talk about her problems with other people, the two of them very similar in that aspect. They usually had their separate ways of coping and de-stressing. But Keran always made her talk when she could tell something was truly bothering her.</p><p>"I just..." she paused, trying to collect her thoughts.</p><p>There really was no point in lying to her. But that didn’t mean she had to drop the whole truth on her either.</p><p>"I’m gonna miss you when you’re gone."</p><p>Keran’s motions slowly came to a stop. She could feel the other girl staring at her, but she didn’t dare to meet her eyes.</p><p>She felt selfish, not wanting to let go of Keran when she knew how much she wanted this. She needed this. The last thing she wanted was to make this about herself and her own needs. Keran was leaving in just a few days. Love and support was all she needed from her group members right now.</p><p>"Is this why you’ve been kind of distant lately?" She asked, her voice much quieter than before.</p><p>The answer is evident when Junxi doesn't speak again. And if she had looked at Keran, she might have caught a slight hint of hurt in her eyes.</p><p>"Of course I’ll miss you guys too. So much. But i’ll only be away for a few months at most." Keran’s voice was nearly as soothing as the hand rubbing her back. Not sure which of the two was giving her goosebumps.</p><p>"I know." Junxi finally says.</p><p>"I’m just so used to seeing you every day. Eating with you, going out with you. You’re the first person I see when I wake up and the last before I go to sleep at night."</p><p>"I just can't imagine life without you." Junxi admits, then immediately shuts herself up. She panics in her head when she realizes she had basically confessed her feelings for the other girl.</p><p>"God that sounds really dramatic, you’re not leaving for good." Junxi chuckled nervously.</p><p>Keran just shook her head, smiling gently.</p><p>"No, I get it."</p><p>Maybe she feels the same way.</p><p>They end up talking for a while. Keran smoothly transitioning into happier topics whenever they start getting too negative about things. They talk about life, their careers. Everything they want to accomplish and experience together in the coming years. It’s always so easy talking with Keran. She’s usually so quiet and reserved, but if you’re lucky enough to get close to her she’ll reveal a very different side of herself. Somehow she always knows what to say. She thinks she could listen to Keran’s voice all day and never get tired of it. <em>God</em>, she is so lucky to have her.</p><p>The mood slowly shifted into a lighter one. Junxi cracking a dumb joke that seemed to make Keran’s face light up. She laughed. Quietly, to avoid waking up Lin Fan or Xichen. And Junxi felt her heartbeat pick up. Wanting to poke the dimple appearing on Keran’s cheek.</p><p>She doesn’t know when her left hand ended up on Keran’s shoulder. Or when their legs got all tangled together, leaving even less space between them than before. All she knows is that it feels right. This is where she wants to be.</p><p>Her hand unconsciously moves up to Keran’s hair, pushing dark locks away to reveal pretty brown eyes. Allowing herself to get lost in them for a second. Keran’s lips part as if she’s about to speak, but no words come out.</p><p>Junxi can’t help but stare. She always loved Keran’s lips. The way they were so perfectly sculpted. How full and plump they were. The little mole under her bottom lip complimenting them so well. Not to mention how soft her lips always felt pressed against her own.</p><p>Keran seemed to notice. Her mouth closing and her gaze falling down, attempting to avoid Junxi.</p><p>She’s getting shy.</p><p><em>Cute</em>.</p><p>"Lu Keran." Junxi coos.</p><p>It takes a few tries to regain Keran’s attention. But when she finally does she smiles softly as Keran looks at her again. Her eyebrows slightly furrowed and a small pout back on her lips. Junxi giggles.</p><p>"Hey, don’t do that."</p><p>Junxi leans forward, feeling Keran’s breath on her own lips. Barely a centimeter apart.</p><p>"Makes me want to kiss you."</p><p>
  <em>When did she get so confident all of a sudden?</em>
</p><p>Keran just huffs in disbelief, yet she is the one to close the distance between them.</p><p>Electricity rushes through her veins when Keran kisses her. Fireworks exploding in her chest. She kisses her deeply with so much passion. Completely taking her breath away. Was this really happening right now? Her hand slides through Keran’s hair, playing with the short strands between her fingers. Both of Keran’s arms wrap around her, tightening their hold.</p><p>Her lips are softer than cotton. Junxi imagines this is what it would feel like to kiss the clouds. They kissed so many times before, yet this is a whole new experience. There is nothing rushing them. No audience or dumb excuses. They are finally doing it for themselves, no one else. It’s the most intimate they’ve ever been.</p><p>Still it becomes overwhelming.</p><p>Junxi pulls away first, giving both of them some time to catch their breaths. Her heart is beating so fast she’s afraid it might explode. She lets out a heavy sigh. Her hand moving to cup Keran’s cheek, watching as her eyes fluttered open. She has this dreamy look on her face that Junxi has never seen before. Her eyes sparkling while she stares so lovingly into Junxi’s.</p><p>"You’re so beautiful." She whispers. Watching a wide grin spread across Keran’s face. Teeth slightly poking through.</p><p>Junxi leans in and pecks Keran’s lips. Again. Again. And again. Sending her into a fit of giggles.</p><p>"Shut up." Keran guides Junxi on top of her, pulling her into another long kiss.</p><p> </p><p>She doesn’t know when she fell in love with Keran.</p><p>Maybe she always had been.</p><p> </p><p>"Don’t forget about me when you’re surrounded by all those pretty girls."</p><p> </p><p>"How could I?"</p>
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